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Question: Why do people say gay and lesbian as if it's two different things?

(Posted by: bls2514 on 2010-08-18 21:06:04)

Why can't they just say someone is gay? It shouldn't matter if they are male or female. They're either a gay man or a gay woman. Why should gay women get the special privilege of having a special name for them? cjmjm1, why don't you just say you're a gay woman? Why should there be a special term (that's not slang) for a gay woman, but not a gay man? I never got that. Maxwell, you are so right. I think MOST (NOT ALL) women who are into other women who are hot are actually bisexual. MOST REAL lesbians are unattractive. I said MOST not ALL, so if you're a hot lesbian who has never had sex with a man please don't say "I'm not like that! Not all lesbians are like that. " Just because you are an exception to the rule, doesn't mean the rule doesn't apply. Why do you all keep saying Lesbian men? WTF? I'm asking why gay women are called lesbians, but gay men don't have a name for them? Why do people say gay and lesbian as if it's two different things. A lesbian is a gay woman, right? So, why not just say gays (period)? Evantg, LESBIANS ARE GAY WOMEN. You don't see people giving straight women a special name, do you? People are called gay and straight because they are DESCRIPTIVE terms which differentiate the two. A lesbian IS a woman who is gay. A gay person is a homosexual. Why can't anyone understand this?! And why can't an actual gay woman give me a straight (no pun intended) answer to this question. All I'm getting is answers from men who did question really doesn't apply to. It's the truth. Most lesbians are not attractive to men. I guarantee you that 95 % of women who claim to be lesbians that straight men (in general) would find hot are actually bisexual. But you're gay, so you would have no idea what a straight man finds attractive. Summer Nicole, Ok, but I just understand the need to give gay women their own title? What's the point? You have one of the better answers so far, by the way.

Posted by: cjmjm1 on 2010-08-18, 21:08:52

I think the name 'lesbian' sounds like some kind of medical illness. I prefer to call myself gay but in Y!A I use the word lesbian so people know that I am a girl answering the question and not a gay male.

Posted by: Maxwell on 2010-08-18, 21:08:08

Because 99% of straight men think two chicks making out or doing it is worthy of attention, and straight men, basically, rule the world.

Posted by: {L} on 2010-08-18, 21:08:29

Because a fag is no longer considered a cigarette. . no, for real: It is not their fault. Lesbians actually do refer to themselves as gay. It is society that separates the two. . soconfused81: makes a good point. I want to change my answer to what he said. :)

Posted by: soconfused81 on 2010-08-18, 21:10:17

The generic, or gender neutral term you are looking for is homosexual, gay and lesbian are the gender specific adjectives, nothing special or sexist about either. Now the fact that society has added a negatice conotation to "gay " is a whole nother story...

Posted by: Raquel on 2010-08-18, 21:10:45

Why should lesbian men get the special privilege of having a special name for them? While I'm no expert, I believe there ARE differences between "gay " and "lesbian " besides gender. At least, when I hear about scientific developments on the origins of homosexuality, they are always mentioned separately. For example, if a woman has many sons, each younger son is more likely to develop homosexuality in the womb than the one before. I have never heard the same thing regarding daughters. I have, however, heard of chemicals known to cause or prevent lesbianism in the womb, but have never heard "gay " mentioned in that context.

Posted by: shonoel on 2010-08-18, 21:12:45

Beats me. There are Lesbian men living on the island of Lesbos. Gay used to mean happy. Straight used to mean the shortest distance between two points. Queer used to mean unusual. Fag used to mean cigarette or in old England a boy who ran errands for school prefects. Some of my best friends are homosexual but I tease them about how they have stuffed up the English language.

Posted by: Dr. Phibes on 2010-08-18, 21:14:44

Mainly, and reallly? Because most gay women dont like being called gay.....they are LESBIAN. They feel it sets them apart from gay men. Most lesbians are noted for not liking gay men anyway....or so I keep being told. Strictly for reference, "gay " is male and "lesbian " is female.

Posted by: Riley on 2010-08-18, 21:23:43

In Australia us gay guys and girls all address just our sexual orientation as being 'gay'. Otherwise were just Aussies, like everyone else in our country. Being we all don't have society discriminating labels, tags, foreign national hyphening. Nor stereotype persons by there colour, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, or non or visual disability's or by there non or personal beliefs, into separatist groups. Were called by our given names or mate, by both genders. It's ironic how homosexuality still isn't totally accepted in the United States. Yet homosexual sexually orientated girls, have all been given a dictionary listed separatist and sexist sexual orientation tagged name.

Posted by: Evantg on 2010-08-18, 21:29:32

If it's a special name.. Then with that logic let's stop calling straight people straight, and gay men gay.. because those poor bisexuals are only called bisexual, so why should anyone else get a "special privilege "? Let's just call people either heterosexual, bisexual, or homosexual. Lesbians are called lesbians because society feels a need to label everything. You have to either be either straight or gay or lesbian, if you can't decide then your bi.. if you really can't decide then your pansexual or if you could care less then your asexual. Every category has a sub-category and that's all gay and lesbian is. Another way for society to force a label on people. You do realize that by saying that "MOST REAL lesbians are unattractive " is not only a bigoted statement, but an uneducated one too? You may think that most hot lesbians are bisexual, but they're not. A lesbian is a lesbian, because she's not attracted to men, and that makes her A REAL LESBIAN. And there are just as many feminine lesbians as masculine ones. The butchs or studs just stand out more to you because they aren't straight in appearance. EDIT: @bls2514 Actually I'm not gay, but thank you for the compliment. I'm a biological female transitioned to male, aka transguy. So I at one point was one of those "real lesbians " as you like to call it, and dated those hot girls that you think are bisexual. So I can say with more experience than you, they aren't bi, they don't like real penis, and just because they are feminine doesn't make them any less of a real lesbian than a buzz cut diesel dyke. You can use CAPS LOCK all you want your "theory " is still flawed. If you break down the main three sexual orientations of people you get heterosexuals, homosexuals and bisexuals. Of those 3 groups 2 have descriptive terms that are used other than the aforementioned to describe their sexuality. So as I've said before, if you want to make a huff about lesbians getting a "special name ", then following your logic.. the terms straight and gay are also special names since bisexuals have no second descriptive term for their sexuality. Bottom line is who cares what they are called, you're not being called a lesbian so it doesn't effect you, and you obviously have minimal if any respect for them if you think just because you find them attractive then there is a 95% chance that they really like the penis too.

Posted by: Percy on 2010-08-18, 21:29:44

Shonoel, for reference, straight people came up with all those terms (except, perhaps ironically, straight). Tease yourself.

Posted by: Summer Nicole on 2010-08-18, 21:45:30

From my experience, "lesbians " DO refer to themselves as gay. It's everyone else that calls them lesbian. I'm bisexual but if someone or some form asks my orientation, I say/ mark gay & so do my friends (male & female) who're gay or bisexual.